GETTING TO THE TRUE "VALUE" OF OTHERS
by Benjamin B. Conley, M.Div., LMFT
http://www.anthospublishing.com

 

All business is social, and without customers, no company would
be able to survive. That's why it is so surprising that we spend
so little time actually trying to understand PEOPLE when we do
business. Certainly, we try to understand behaviors -- when do
people buy, what do people buy, at what times do people buy --
but we seldom think about the foundations that make these
behaviors occur.

The key to understanding anyone, whether it is a friend, a family
member, or a customer, is understanding our most fundamental
values. These values go beyond the scope of mere behaviors or
beliefs -- rather, they are the cornerstone of who we are and how
we see the world.

When Thomas Jefferson wrote the Declaration of Independence, he
outlined three of the most fundamental values that we as a people
hold: Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness.

These same values can inform us when we examine our relationships
with customers. From "Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of
Happiness," we can formulate three truisms:

1) People have value because they exist (Life): The very first
lesson we should learn is that people are more important than
profits. When you look at your customer, you should see them as a
person, with their own dreams, desires, and passions -- not as a
potential profit. If it is clear that your goal is to help the
person, not make the sale, there is a much better chance that a
healthy relationship can develop.

2) People make decisions governing themselves (Liberty): For some
reason, this is a hard concept for salespeople to grasp -- it is
the CUSTOMER who makes the decision, NOT the sales pitch or
advertisement. Communication scholars dismissed the idea that
advertising can FORCE a customer to make a certain decision a
long time ago.

Instead of believing that we have to convince or sway a customer
to make a certain decision, we should look upon ourselves as
people who are providing good, truthful information that will
HELP the CUSTOMER make a reasonable, informed choice. Thus, we
are not changing a customer's mind, but rather helping them make
the best decision they can.

3) People think, feel, and act in their own way (Happiness): It
is also important that we understand that different people have
different beliefs, needs, and desires. That's probably why
scripted telemarketer spiels don't work very well. If you want to
truly make a connection with your customers, I suggest that you
try to understand their individual differences and even embrace
them.

It has been said that the secret to business success is building
lasting relationships. I think that if we truly wish to create a
relationship with our customers, we need to make sure that we
first treat them as valued persons and seek to understand their
values. Only in this way can we build a bridge that will be
beneficial to both parties.

Author Benjamin B. Conley is a licensed Marriage and Family
therapist and an ordained Elder in the United Methodist Church.
Anthos Publishing has recently released his book "The Spiritual
Connection: Values, Faith, and Psychotherapy," which integrates
spirituality and various systems of psychotherapy by focusing on
their shared values. To find out more, please visit Amazon.com or
http://www.anthospublishing.com. Benjamin can be reached by mail
at: benconley@anthospublishing.com.